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(Crossposted from Tumblr.)

In another post I made, I spoke about a relationship I had that felt more like a Secret Third Thing than a "typical" romantic relationship.

[…]make what basically amounts to the opposite of a suicide pact with someone ("despite everything we are going to live the best that we can, and we're taking each other with us") without any particular feelings involved, only for particular feelings to get involved (to this day, despite the feelings, it still feels more like a Secret Third Thing than dating per se. probably because we don't consider the feelings the origin or foundation of our relationship)

Because I feel like rambling about in-system relationships, Secret Third Things, and their overlap today, I'll disclose that that particular relationship is with another person in my system. (The other in that post being my outerworld partners - those relationships are also unconventional in their own ways, but that's a story for another post.)

There's a bit of important context to know about us first. (It involves past trauma, particularly child abuse - I've put it under the cut.)

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