Catapults and screaming gingerbread men
Dec. 13th, 2018 05:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hungryghostsNow that we're finally open for business, let's ring in the journal by celebrating the sheer delightful perverseness of Christmas in Tyria.
So, as far as perverse takes on overly commercialized holidays go, GW2 isn't actually that extreme. It's mild enough that if I squint and tilt my head, I can think that it was all unintentional. (I really don't think it's unintentional, though. I mean, they wrapped up a story arc by turning an immortal dictator into baby dragon feed.)
But, oh! I just am in A Mood lately. A Mood that delights in celebrating the holiday by locking myself indoors and smashing down miniature towns and punting adorable plush gryphons across the room with a giant candy cane before they maul my face off. Dashing desperately across a labyrinth of collapsing snowflake platforms in the bitter cold, only to get thrown into the void by a giant exploding present or flattened by a giant snowball boulder while Gremlin Santa looks on and laughs and says "'Tis a wound-up day, wouldn't you say?"
Oh yes, and the faceless screaming princess dolls.
These things! They surround you and scream and scream until you die. They are horrible and I love them. I want ten of them so that anyone who tries to rob my house won't leave alive.
Ahem.
Anyway. We're having a surprisingly good time withTyrian Murder Christmas Wintersday. Here's some more pics.
(Bigger image of the field of death)
(these things scream too!!!)
And as a palate cleanser...
Look at those adorable blank eyes!
Transcripts
First image: A screenshot of a Twitter thread by yours truly.
First tweet: {P} ah, yes, our favorite holiday tradition: laying waste to miniature civilization and massacring toys with the siege weapons we build from the ruins
Second tweet: you think we're kidding.
Attached image: A field full of tiny wrecked buildings and miniature catapults, some in the process of raining down death upon a toy.
Third tweet: everyone else: "gifts! family! food :D" us: "CATAPULTS"
Second image: A screenshot of dialogue.
NPC: "Are you ready to face the Toypocalypse?"
Dialogue response option: "Yes, I love the smell of peppermint in the morning!"
Third image: A bunch of giant animate gingerbread men jumping for joy.
Fourth image: An adorable animate plush gryphon with a big smile and dull eyes.
So, as far as perverse takes on overly commercialized holidays go, GW2 isn't actually that extreme. It's mild enough that if I squint and tilt my head, I can think that it was all unintentional. (I really don't think it's unintentional, though. I mean, they wrapped up a story arc by turning an immortal dictator into baby dragon feed.)
But, oh! I just am in A Mood lately. A Mood that delights in celebrating the holiday by locking myself indoors and smashing down miniature towns and punting adorable plush gryphons across the room with a giant candy cane before they maul my face off. Dashing desperately across a labyrinth of collapsing snowflake platforms in the bitter cold, only to get thrown into the void by a giant exploding present or flattened by a giant snowball boulder while Gremlin Santa looks on and laughs and says "'Tis a wound-up day, wouldn't you say?"
Oh yes, and the faceless screaming princess dolls.
These things! They surround you and scream and scream until you die. They are horrible and I love them. I want ten of them so that anyone who tries to rob my house won't leave alive.
Ahem.
Anyway. We're having a surprisingly good time with
(Bigger image of the field of death)
(these things scream too!!!)
And as a palate cleanser...
Look at those adorable blank eyes!
Transcripts
First image: A screenshot of a Twitter thread by yours truly.
First tweet: {P} ah, yes, our favorite holiday tradition: laying waste to miniature civilization and massacring toys with the siege weapons we build from the ruins
Second tweet: you think we're kidding.
Attached image: A field full of tiny wrecked buildings and miniature catapults, some in the process of raining down death upon a toy.
Third tweet: everyone else: "gifts! family! food :D" us: "CATAPULTS"
Second image: A screenshot of dialogue.
NPC: "Are you ready to face the Toypocalypse?"
Dialogue response option: "Yes, I love the smell of peppermint in the morning!"
Third image: A bunch of giant animate gingerbread men jumping for joy.
Fourth image: An adorable animate plush gryphon with a big smile and dull eyes.
